It’s an old one but…
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Wife smacked me because i post a pic of her when she had glasses 
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The glasses look good on her. 
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Flashback to 2002. I was barely out of my junior year in high school and framing houses for the summer. Made friends with some other kids from a high school in the country who got me into a fist fight outside of a movie theater with football rivals. I didn’t even play football nor did I really know anyone I was punching. I tell that story to say this:
You look just like the cop that had me in handcuffs while he called my dad to come pick me up. You should’ve seen the angry gaggle of parents getting tickets for a bunch of high school idiots disturbing the peace barely after dark. That was the first and last time I ever had a run in with the 5-0. Didn’t even get to see the movie. The end.
Were you or have you ever been an officer of the KCPD?
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That was my last job, lol! I work in an office now.
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If you’re telling me you don’t wear one all day, everyday my worldview is shattered.
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Um, you need more in your life Squid if that is the case 
I haven’t even gotten to play in the lab here, I’m too busy working on regulatory stuff. Maybe I’ll get there one day though 
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I’ve seen her in a lab coat!
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That cat has hair!
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Only ones I like…those hairless ones are different critters to me
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Lol!!! True
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