What are you serious wood guys using to de-fur pickets? Something I can get at Home Depot or lowes?

50 to 80 grit works great.

I use a random orbital sander w 60 but I thought there was a special pad or something I could hook up to a drill to get in between the spindles

Are you thinking of an osborne brush?

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Hard to get in between the spindles, if its noticeably bad we will just run some scotch brite pads or some sanding sponges to knock the fur off quick. You could run a defurring pad on a makita but it just gets tore up too quick trying to do it in between the pickets

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I just got a 10$ pad for my drill and attached a piece of 40 grit to it, pretty happy with the results.